This final chapter focuses on attachment and separation and how they have traditionally been positioned in theories of human development. While the two are seen as “reiterative counterpoints” throughout human lives, in theories of development separation is privileged.

Gilligan cites psychologist Daniel Levinson’s theory of development, in which relationships such as the “mentor” and the “special woman” enable the (male) hero to achieve success. These are merely “transitional figures” who are no longer relevant once success is achieved. George Vaillant’s work also focuses on individual achievement through the lens of work. He seeks to provide more clarity for what he views as the nebulous decades of a person’s 20s through 40s in Erikson’s theory of development.

While the reality of separation is recognized in theories of human development, the reality of continuing connection is neglected, pushed to the background where women are also relegated. Such a forced recession of connection, however, distorts the “dialogue” of individuation and connection that contains “the dialectic that creates the tension of human development” (156).

Gilligan continues to theorize how construction of identity, whether through self-expression or self-sacrifice, creates “problems” in human development. In the first case, there is a “problem of human connection,” and in the second, a “problem of truth” (157).