In many ways, Dahlia and Julian must reckon with their pasts to move toward a healthy relationship. For both protagonists, grief and depression have had profound impacts on their self-perception and the trajectories of their lives. Part of their character arcs in Love Redesigned thus revolves around learning to confront and overcome the effects of grief and depression on their relationships and personal development.

Julian quickly recognized how his grief impacted his relationship with Dahlia after his father’s death, as he believed he could not pursue a relationship with her in the midst of his complicated feelings and responsibilities. He pushed her away, although he also expected Dahlia to reach out again afterward. Julian’s grief left him with no room to consider what she might have been feeling at the time, which exacerbates the misunderstandings between the two characters. During the events of the novel, Dahlia’s depression works similarly. She often battles with her own thoughts about whether or not she is worthy enough to have a relationship, as Oliver led her to believe she is worthless and defective due to her fertility issues. Both Dahlia and Julian must thus learn to gradually confront how their griefs and setbacks stand in the way of being with one another.