“When Death Comes” by Mary Oliver (1991)

Oliver’s belief that one must accept death’s inevitability to enjoy life’s smallest moments fully reoccurs throughout her oeuvre. In this 1991 poem, Oliver wants to move through her life with amazement so that she can reach death with a sense of curiosity. Oliver approaches death more philosophically, less personal, and grounded than in 2005’s “Oxygen.” Death comes across more as a thought experiment than a lived possibility here.

“Witch-Wife” by Edna St. Vincent Millay (1917)

A significant influence on Oliver’s craft, early 20th Century American poet Edna St. Vincent Millay also openly wrote about same-sex desire between women. In “Witch-Wife,” Millay bittersweetly captures her crush’s physical beauty and independence, even as she knows “she never will be all mine” (Lines 2, 12).

“The Embrace” by Mark Doty (1998)

In the late 20th and early 21st Centuries, marriage equality became an important issue for American LGBTQ+ activists. People were often locked out of decisions regarding their partner’s health because they were not spouses nor legal relatives, especially during the AIDS crisis. As a result, caregiving and hospice work became essential activities in the LGBTQ+ community.