“If this story doesn’t exist now, it will. Thinking is an act. Feeling is a fact. Put the two together—I am the one writing what I am writing. God is the world. Truth is always an interior and inexplicable contact. My tourist life is unrecognizable, extremely interior and there is not a single word that defines it. My heart has emptied itself of every desire and been reduced to its own final or primary beat. The toothache that runs through this story has given me a sharp stab in the middle of our mouth.”

Rodrigo’s use of language in this passage establishes his distinct point of view and tone. He asserts that his writing project is an act of self-expression, self-exploration, and the search for meaning, introducing the novel’s thematic concern regarding The Search for Meaning and Identity.

“The story—I determine with false free will—will have around seven characters and I’m obviously one of the more important. I, Rodrigo S. M. An old tale, this, since I don’t want to be all modern and invent trendy words to make myself look original. So that’s why I’ll try contrary to my normal habits to write a story with a beginning, middle and ‘grand finale’ followed by silence and falling rain.”

Rodrigo’s declarations about the story he’s writing capture his desire to find and convey truth through literature. At the same time, his declarative statements about Macabéa’s story foreshadow the struggles that he later encounters in the process and the questions that writing her tale raise for him.

“Anyway. It seems that I’m changing the way I write. But it so happens that I only write what I want, I’m not a professional—and I have to write about this northeastern girl or I’ll choke. She’s accusing me and the way to defend myself is to write about her. I write in bold and severe painter’s strokes. I’ll be dealing with facts as if they were the irremediable stone I spoke of earlier. Even though to get me going I want bells to peal while I guess at reality. And may angels flutter as transparent wasps around my hot head because this head wants finally to transform itself into an object-thing, it’s easier.”

Rodrigo’s deep connection with his fictional character inspires his desperation to write Macabéa’s story. He wants to bring her to life on the page because she’s an extension of some vital yet inarticulable and fearful part of himself. His esoteric language and dramatic tone capture the profundity of his connection with his work too.